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Good advice.
Don’t start at the top of the mountain
Everybody seems to want to start at the top of the mountain! How often do you meet someone and within days or weeks are thinking "He's perfect!" "He's amazing!" "We really hit it off!" "He could be the one!"
The One?!? THE ONE?!?! It’s too soon to tell!
If you’re doing that, you're starting at the top of the mountain. And when you start at the top of the mountain, the only way to go is... down.
Is your relationship (or job) complete?
How do you know when it is the right time to leave a job or a relationship? How do you give yourself permission to breakup, move on, or decide your current circumstance no longer suits you? You just decide.
Most of us are conditioned to believe we have to have a 'good reason' to make such decisions. You don't have to have a good reason to change jobs or change relationships. You can just decide that the one you are in is 'complete.'
On a funeral, napping, and people pleasing
What do my uncle's funeral and a podcast about resting have in common? We need to let go of the need to people please in order to have everyone cry at your funeral when you die. Women are socialized to believe our value is in serving others. That we should always be busy, that we are never allowed to rest. There is another way. You do not have to earn your rest. You are allowed to say no to projects and people that aren't aligned with the kind of life you want to create for yourself.
How I went from hating my ex to getting along better than ever
Five years ago I was full of rage and divorcing my then husband. Today we get along better than ever - including having family time with our son and my (not his) daughter. What changed?
Hint: Not him.
Why is it so hard to ask for help?
Women are notoriously bad at asking for help. What keeps us from asking for help? Usually shame, for starters. But doing it all is not the answer.
You are creating your own results
Take a moment and look around at your life --- notice your relationships, your work, your family --- take a quick stock of what is. Then consider for a moment that you have created all of this with your thoughts. How so? Your thoughts create your feelings which lead you to take actions which create your results. The good news? You can change your thoughts and feelings to change your results!
Your resistance is causing you suffering
Does it seem like if other people would just do things differently, you wouldn’t have to suffer? That if other people would just change, your experience in life would be better?
This is called resistance and it is causing you to suffer. Here’s why and what to do about it.
What is shame and what can you do about it?
What is shame? It is the feeling of distress that stems from believing there is a ‘right’ or ‘wrong’ way to do something and that you are doing it wrong. This is not a helpful emotion. Here’s what to do instead.
Confusion is a lie
You think you’re confused. Confusion makes you feel stuck and unable to make a decision. You’re not confused, you’re scared. Here’s what’s really going on.