The biggest difference between men and women dating

Here's what I think is the biggest difference between men and women who are dating: Generally speaking, most men are dating for dating. Most women are dating for a relationship. 

I'll explain, and why I think it matters.

From my vantage point, I have seen lots and lots and lots of men who want to ‘see what’s out there' and ‘get back out there’ and date after their divorces, while separated, or after a long-term relationship ends. Sometimes they are aware enough to put in their dating profiles that they are looking for something ‘casual.’ But lots of times they don't. Often, men just want to get out, have dinner and conversation and enjoy someone's company for a few hours. Sometimes it's the same person for a few weeks or months at a time. Sometimes it's only for a night. This results in a series of short-term relationships and a lot of, well, ‘dating.'

Which is fine.

But…

Women, on the other hand, are typically dating for a ‘relationship.’ Most women are going on dates and sizing up what kind of long-term potential each person might have. Most women aren't dating just to be ‘dating.’ Usually, women want to make connections and develop a relationship with someone. Every connection becomes a game of “Could he be the one?!” (which is a terrible exercise, for the record).

Why does this matter?

Women who are looking for a relationship are dating men who are looking for dating and then when the ‘relationship’ ends after a few months, the woman starts to wonder what went wrong and assume there must be something wrong with her (also a terrible exercise). 

But nothing went wrong, except for the fact that you were dating someone who wanted to be dating and not someone who was ready or willing to be in a long-term relationship. (Even if they said they were ready for a relationship, they may not be.)

Women shouldn’t feel terrible every time a relationship doesn't work out. Women shouldn’t feel like they did something wrong or wonder if they had acted differently or just been… different… maybe the relationship would have worked out. 

It wouldn't have. 

If you're ready to get out of dating frustration and into dating empowerment, let's chat. I know all the ins and outs of how people date and can help you get off the hamster wheel and into less-stressed dating. I want you feeling amazing in a relationship, not heartbroken in a breakup.