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Good advice.

Paige Dempsey 12/30/22 Paige Dempsey 12/30/22

Does going home feel like a visit to Dysfunction Junction Lane?

Let's get right to it: If spending time with family feels challenging for you, you are not alone. If you feel like you 'have' to be there, but you don't really 'want' to be there, you are not alone.

'Tis the season for comparison and wishing we had something that other people have.

That warm, inviting family where all are welcome, and everyone gets along and enjoys each other's company.

Is that your family? It's not mine.

I do not expect a warm and Hallmark-worthy holiday because that is just not how our family operates, even in a good year.

But in the longing for something I don't have, I have an opportunity...

What else could be true?

With the holidays upon is, we have more obligations, more family time, longer school breaks, and more opportunities for people to be frustrated. We also have more opportunities to feel slighted if other people aren't acting according to the 'manual' of how we think they should.

If you find yourself stuck thinking about someone else's behavior and what you're making it mean to you, here is a simple exercise you can try:

Ask yourself, "what else could be true?"

We all make up stories in our head about what we think someone else's behavior means. But...there's a good chance we might be wrong about that, or at least what they meant it to mean.